The Ministry of Education and Science is working on startup legislation

People in the Ministry of Education and Science are working hard to regulate innovations. They work so hard that beads of sweat are dripping from their foreheads.

We’ll finally have our own startup act in Ukraine just in a moment. Here’s some more information (available in Ukrainian):

Dear Ukrainian founders, we recommend you to sell your lousy Delaware companies ASAP and give the money back your old-school venture investors. The thing is, Ukrainian legislators will finally give us the clear definition of a startup.

“Since Ukraine is currently having a great potential for startup development, we must create a legal framework to support them”, says Mr. Viktor Shovkaliuk, Director of the Department for Innovation Activities and Transfer of Technologies at the Ministry of Education and Science of Ukraine (very laconic and startup-friendly naming, right?). Let’s use the abbreviation DDIATT MES to make it sound even more laconic. It goes without saying that if you’re the DDIATT MES, you are required to create legal frameworks. For example, for something that has been doing quite all right without any government regulation for decades. Now you have to take it by the throat and control it. Finally!

“In this document, we will provide a clear definition for a term ‘startup’, specify how it should work, define its annual revenue and kinds of activities it should be engaged in”, says DDIATT MES. Obviously, this promise works wonders. While bags under startup founders’ eyes disappear, they straighten their backs and dash away grateful tears with their shaky hands. “We will as well provide definitions for social and innovation startups”, says Mr. Shovkaliuk. Sure enough, this is the best news ever for those who are sick and tired of libertarianism and hostility of the market.

“In our law draft, we will spell out the algorithms that will enhance commercialization of inventions developed in Ukraine and attract non-budget sources for funding the innovation activities, etc.”, he announces shyly. But maybe, there’s more to come! Sure as hell, it’s going to be legendary! Maybe they’re planning on encouraging investment for startups on A round using the funds of condominiums, FBOs, or NGOs. Maybe they’re also planning on authorizing the startups that work with natural resources to use the free labor of people serving sentence in prisons.

DDIATT MES has found out that startups usually undergo a very complicated registration procedure as big taxpayers. That’s why the law draft sets out a lower income tax rate for startups: 30% from the current income tax rate for the first two years, 50% for the third year, 60% for the fourth year and finally, 70% for the fifth year.

Thank goodness, people at the Ministry of Education and Science have realized that they are the only ones who can take care about startups. We hope that it won’t take them long to realize that startups don’t need any regulation for shareholder agreements, option plans, and convertible notes, and of course, they don’t need courts that actually work. What they enjoy the most is being down on the floor at the point of a law enforcement officer’s machine gun. And they surely take delight in being accused of illegal cryptocurrency mining. You don’t bother to simplify business conditions and encourage the development of emerging companies. Instead, you write another long-read law and create a free trade zone, a technology park or, let’s be honest, a ghetto for startups.

We do hope that DDIATT MES won’t stop working wonders. After having dealt with startups, he’s going to help other IT companies to finally get their ducks in a row.